(Courtesy G4tv)
E3 is known for a few specific things. Primarily, there are the games themselves. Seemingly endless displays of demos and game footage stretch from one end of the LA Convention Center to the other. Another E3 characteristic is swag. Everywhere you look, somebody is handing out some sort of T-shirt or little gadget to promote their product. But the one thing that has become synonymous with E3, especially among the fellas, are booth babes; those lovely, captive women that pretty much have to let you ogle them and take pictures. Their job is undoubtedly the hardest of any at the show and what kind of E3 correspondent would I be if I didn't make it just a little bit tougher?
While many trinkets and freebies are given away at E3, the ultimate piece of swag for any guy gamer is a booth babe's phone number. So, to help out some of my less suave gamer friends out there, I decided to come up with, and test out, the top ten pick-up lines for E3 booth babes.
10. "I've got some swag for you, in my PANTS!"
This is undeniably the sleaziest line that I used and it was met with a lot of scorn and attempted slaps, (my reflexes are cat-like thanks to sweet, sweet video games!). I suppose that this line could work on someone, but would you really want to get to know that kind of booth babe? This was the least successful line that I used.
9. "You're the first woman without elf ears that I have ever been attracted to. Marry me!"
If you've decided to try a line that works exclusively as "babe repellent," this is it. While a very few chuckled at the undeniable nerd-osity, most just shuffled away quietly.
8. "What's your nude code?"
Direct, forceful, immature, this got the kind of response that many of you would rightly assume. I got a lot of annoyed faces and brush-offs following this one, so I'm putting it toward the bottom of the list, although it's near the top in geeky sleaze factor.
7. "Sure, the game's great, but when can I play YOUR demo?"
I really don't like this line. It's vaguely dirty, but not full on, man-up sleazy and therefore not potentially funny. It just kind of comes out of your mouth and dies there. While I never was threatened with physical violence for it, I certainly never generated any interest.
6. "You make Princess Peach look like Pauline."
This line tended to draw a lot of "huh?" and "ooookay . . ." Apparently booth babes are a little weak on their video game history. Once I explained the reference though, some feigned flattery.
5. "Don't be fooled by this facade. I'm much cooler in the virtual world."
If delivered properly, this one can make the ladies laugh, which is always a good way to start a conversation. Just be wary, unless you play it pretty firmly over the top, some of them may think you're serious.
4. "Are you an angel, because your texture mapping is divine!"
A pretty geeky line, but if delivered with the right amount of tongue-in-cheek, it can be pulled off. Just make sure that you know your target. Some of the babes I tried this out on seemed to have picked up a little of the lingo and got a good laugh out of it. Others just moved away as quickly as possible and avoided eye contact.
3. "Excuse me, is this the line to rock your world?"
Perfect for that booth babe who's manning a line for some demo and looks like she could use a laugh. This got at least a genuine smile from every young lady I tried it out with, and if that's not a good opening, I don't know what is.
2. "I'm developing a new make-out program. Would you like to join the beta test?"
This is one of my favorites. It's geeky and funny, but not too crude and not too tough to grasp for the lady. Responses to this one were universally positive and I only had to explain the concept of a beta test once.
1. "Can I buy you a ten-dollar margarita?"
This line is pretty damn close to solid gold. First, it shows that you're attentive to her needs as the show floor is HOT and it's easy to become parched. Second, it shows that you're willing to drop some fairly serious ducats on getting to know her. Third, a little alcohol never hurt any guy's chances. Just don't promise a cold beverage and fail to deliver!
Obviously I can't guarantee success with any of these lines, but some of them may just give you a fighting chance. Just remember not to take anything too seriously and do your best to make that poor lady's day better, because goodness knows it's bad enough without an uncaring, wannabe Casanova hounding her.
--Steve Dove
http://www.g4tv.com 
