Author Topic: News! (Read 7321 times)

Bourbon_Ghost · « **on:** October 13, 2004, 01:34:50 PM »

I would just like to remake this thread seeing that we always have some funny stuff that can be said as news. Besides i really like bourbon!

no i mean the drink,

... just joking Bourbonites Rule!

Carigamers · « **on:** October 13, 2004, 01:34:50 PM »

Bob · « **Reply #1 on:** October 13, 2004, 04:48:59 PM »

wrong place buddy

QDizzle · « **Reply #2 on:** October 14, 2004, 01:23:12 AM »

bourbon make as much sense as New Era Outlaw talking bout his under wear insidde his fridge and ting like dat wtf this thread for

Bsensei · « **Reply #3 on:** October 14, 2004, 07:26:26 AM »

Yea really ghost u need to alter this i dont understand what it is about and we does be limin all the time :s come on

coldstorm · « **Reply #4 on:** October 14, 2004, 07:29:31 AM »

i just confused

Carigamers · « **Reply #4 on:** October 14, 2004, 07:29:31 AM »

Bourbon_Ghost · « **Reply #5 on:** October 14, 2004, 05:18:03 PM »

Geez your'll remember the post Strongton made before right?...well this is the new observe.

Subject: A New Breed Of Rapists
]]]
]]] ]A woman at a nightclub on Saturday night was taken by 5 men, who
]]] ]according to hospital and police reports, gang raped her before
]]]dumping
]]] ]her. Unable to remember the events of the evening, tests later
]]] ]]confirmed
]]]the repeat rapes along with traces of Rohypnol in her blood ]and
]]]Progesterex, essentially a small sterilization pill. The drug is
]]] ]now
]]]being used by rapists at parties to rape AND sterilize their
]]] ]victims.
]]]Progesterex is available to vets to sterilize large animals.
]]] ]Progesterex is being used together with Rohypnol, the date rape
]]]drug.
]]] ]As with Rohypnol, all they have to do is drop it into the girl's
]]]drink.
]]] ]The girl can't remember a thing the next morning, of all that
]]]had taken
]]] ]place the night before. Progesterex, which dissolves in drinks
]]]just as
]]] ]easily, is such that the victim doesn't conceive from the rape
]]]and the
]]] ]rapist needn't worry about having a paternity test identifying
]]]him
]]] ]months later. The drug's effects ARE NOT TEMPORARY - They are
]]] ]P*E*R*M*A*N*E*N*T Progesterex was designed to sterilize horses.
]]]Any
]]] ]female who takes it WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO CONCEIVE. The weasels
]]]can get
]]] ]this drug from anyone who is in the vet school or any
]]]university. It's
]]] ]that easy, and Progesterex is about to break out big on campuses
]]] ]everywhere. Believe it or not, there are even sites on the
]]]Internet
]]] ]telling people how to use it. Please forward this to everyone
]]]you know,
]]] ]especially girls. Be careful when you're out and don't leave
]]]your drink
]]] ]unattended. Please make the effort to forward this on to all you
]]] ]know...Guys, please inform all your female friends and
]]]relatives.

^^^Therefore News understand [_[

Bourbon_Ghost · « **Reply #6 on:** October 15, 2004, 11:44:05 AM »

News Paper clipping reads;

Greetings Everybody!

I know that there has been a lot of focus on the news lately about the
hurricanes and tropical storms affecting the East Coast of the US, and
Caribbean, the flooding and devastation, the mud slides in the Middle East
and South America and so forth. Before any of you think that you are all
alone with being affected by all these severe weather conditions, I would
just like to let you all know that over here in West Moorings, Trinidad,
we too have our share of natural catastrophes.

Attached is a photo illustrating the damage caused to a home from a storm
that passed through West Moorings last week. It really makes you cherish
what you have, and reminds us not to Take things for granted!

Joseph Wellington
On d Round a Bout
West Moorings
Trinidad, W.I

: a chair that fell over:

QDizzle · « **Reply #7 on:** October 15, 2004, 11:50:18 AM »

ERMM SO BASICALLY HIS THREAD IS LIKE THE NEWSPAPERS OK KOOLS WHO IS D EDITOR OF THIS PRESS

Bob · « **Reply #8 on:** October 17, 2004, 09:58:20 PM »

Umm this is is all fine and dandy but shouldnt this be in the rum shop and not the pit?

Bourbon_Ghost · « **Reply #9 on:** October 18, 2004, 11:28:52 AM »

u guys still discusing where it should be?
it is in the correct place as it is considered, etc polite rumours!

DeadEyes · « **Reply #10 on:** October 18, 2004, 01:10:00 PM »

lol.... while ya'll at it, try and figure out where d douglahs belong....

cereal_killer · « **Reply #11 on:** October 18, 2004, 01:53:13 PM »

dis topic real mad
so far it have real funny articles

Bourbon_Ghost · « **Reply #12 on:** October 19, 2004, 10:40:19 AM »

hey now that u mention it deadeyes

I was in Curry Massala the other day and a man with he girl
walk in and the man shout out for ah "sweet dougla".....
...well i was wondering wat d a$$ going on cause d man gyul not looking bad...and the shop owner watching me and ketching jones....yuh aint go believe is a darn juice d man
calling for!!!!

I was like "WTF" just happen dey.....

Bourbon_Ghost · « **Reply #13 on:** October 19, 2004, 03:05:46 PM »

Subject: A good Trinidadian man.
] ]
] ] ] A Trini woman was walking along the banks of Maracas
] ] Bay Beach when she stumbled upon a old empty bottle.
] ]
] ] She picked it up and rubbed it, and lo-and-behold a
] ] Genie appeared. She talked with him awhile then the
] ] Genie told her he would grant her ONE wish.
] ]
] ] She said she heard from a cousin that she would get
] ] three wishes if she ever found a Genie.
] ]
] ] The Genie said, "Nope, sorry three-wish genies are a
] ] story-tale myth.
] ] I'm a ONE-WISH Genie. So... what'll it be?"
] ] The woman didn't hesitate. She said, "I want peace in
] ] the Middle East.
] ] See this map, I want these countries to stop fighting
] ] with each other and I want all the Arabs to love Jews
] ] and Americans and vice-versa. It will bring about
] ] world peace and harmony."
] ] The Genie looked at the map and exclaimed, "Lord Lady,
] ] Wat wrong wit yu?
] ]
] ] PLEASE BE REASONABLE! These countries have been at war for thousands of years. I'm out of shape after being
] ] in a bottle for five hundred years.
] ] I'm good, but NOT THAT GOOD!!! I don't think it can be done. PLEASE make
] ] another wish and please ah beg yu... Be reasonable."
] ]
] ] The woman thought for a minute and said, "Well, I've
] ] never been able to find the right Trini man...You
] ] know, one that DOESN'T DRINK ALCOHOL, is considerate
] ] and fun, likes to dance yet helps with the cooking &
] ] household chores, is great in bed, will not cheat on me and will attend church with me.
] ]
] ] That's what I wish for... a good Trinidadian man.
] ]
] ] The Genie let out a long sigh, shook his head and
] ] said, "Let me see that blasted map again."

fellahs ......*laughing histerically.....u see.....ahahahahah!

PsiVal · « **Reply #14 on:** October 19, 2004, 03:37:31 PM »

That ral f*** up BG weh and thx 4 d use info early i had 2 kill some ppl i know before 4 slippin SF 2 a friend of mine..lixx 4 so when i c what they slip into d drink

Never do that shit ppl u WILL b shot on sight or Maimed

Bourbon_Ghost · « **Reply #15 on:** October 19, 2004, 03:58:21 PM »

Very True Psi....

fellahs check this 1 out

Success is not the key to happiness, happiness is the key to success.
If you love what you are doing, you will be successful!

Men, there's no need to be confused any longer! Learning the signals below will separate the men from the boys... you might think this list is just a joke, but ask the lady in your life. it's the truth!

Ladies enjoy!

WORDS WOMEN USE
FINE
This is the word women use to end an argument when they feel they are right and you need to shut up. Never use "fine" to describe how a woman looks -- this will cause you to have one of those arguments.

FIVE MINUTES
This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so it's an even trade

NOTHING
This means "something," and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards! "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with "Fine"

GO AHEAD (With Raised Eyebrows)
This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine"

GO AHEAD (Normal Eyebrows)
This means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care" You will get a "Raised Eyebrow Go Ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.

LOUD SIGH
This is not actually a word, but is a nonverbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment, and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing"

SOFT SIGH
Again, not a word, but a nonverbal statement. "Soft Sighs" mean that she is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe, and she will stay content

THAT'S OKAY
This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you back for whatever it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and in conjunction with a "Raised Eyebrow."

GO AHEAD.
At some point in the near future, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble.

PLEASE DO
This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance with the truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay"

THANKS
A woman is thanking you. Do not faint. Just say you're welcome.

THANKS A LOT
This is much different from "Thanks." A woman will say, "Thanks A Lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have offended her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh." Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh," as she will only tell you "Nothing"

Send this to the men you know to warn them about future arguments they can avoid if they remember the terminology.

And send it to your women friends to give them a good laugh

(i not hearing nothing from the rest of comics)

DeadEyes · « **Reply #16 on:** October 19, 2004, 04:37:48 PM »

*takes notes*
anymore u got ghost? this is some helpful stuff here man and i am DAMN SERIOUS

PsiVal · « **Reply #17 on:** October 19, 2004, 05:17:21 PM »

I know where he get that from

Bourbon_Ghost · « **Reply #18 on:** October 20, 2004, 03:01:09 PM »

yes it is Psi, but keep it low profile

Dear Old Dad Has a Point . . . .

A young boy had just gotten his driver's permit and inquired of his father,
an evangelist, if they could discuss his use of the car. His father took him
into his study and said to the boy, "I'll make a deal with you, son. You
bring your grades up from a C to a B, study your Bible a little, get your
hair cut, then we'll talk about the car."

Well, the boy thought about that for a moment, and decided that he'd settle
for the offer, and they agreed on it.

After about six weeks, the boy came back and again asked his father about
using the car. Again, they went to the study, where his father said, "Son ,
I've been real proud of you. You've brought your grades up, and I've
observed that you have been studying your Bible, and participating a lot
more in the Bible study class on Sunday morning. But, I'm real disappointed,
since you haven't gotten your hair cut."

The young man paused a moment, and then said, "You know, Dad, I've been
thinking about that, and I've noticed in my studies of the Bible that Samson
had long hair, John the Baptist had long hair, Moses had long hair and
there's even a strong argument that Jesus had long hair." His father
replied, "You're right, son. Did you also notice that they all walked
everywhere they went?"

Bourbon_Ghost · « **Reply #19 on:** October 21, 2004, 01:12:38 PM »

this one almost ketch meh!

Subject: Blonde moment

Homer, a handsome dude, walked into a sports bar around 9:58 PM. He sat
down
next to this blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV.
The 10:00 news was on. The news crew was covering a story of a man on a
ledge of a large building preparing to jump.

The blonde looks at Homer and says, " Do you think he will jump?"

Homer says, "You know, I bet he'll jump."

The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won't."

Homer placed $20 dollars on the bar and said, "You're on!"

Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy did a swan dive
off
of the building, falling to his death.

The blonde was very upset and handed her $20 dollars to Homer and said,
"All
is fair. Here is your money."

Homer replies," I can't take your money, I saw this earlier on the 5
o'clock
news and knew he would jump."

The blonde replies, "I did too, but I didn't think he'd do it again."

Carigamers · « **Reply #19 on:** October 21, 2004, 01:12:38 PM »

Author Topic: News! (Read 7321 times)

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