Author Topic: Just a Joke (Read 214083 times)

Narcissus · « **Reply #141 on:** August 10, 2005, 02:52:32 PM »

Safe Faxing

Q. Do I have to be married to have safe fax?
A. Although married people fax often, there are many single people who fax complete strangers every day.

Q. How do I go about faxing a complete stranger?
A. Just ask them if they want to fax. If they do, they will give you their phone number.

Q. My parents say they never had fax when they were young, and were only allowed to write memo's to each other until they were 21. How old do you think someone should be before they can fax?
A. Faxing can be performed at any age once you learn the correct procedure.

Q. If I fax something to myself will I go blind?
A. Certainly not. As far as we can see.

Q. There is a place on our street where you can go and pay to fax. Is this legal?
A. Yes, many people have no other outlet for their fax drives and must pay a "professional" when their needs become too great.

Q. Should a cover always be used for faxing?
A. Unless you are really sure of the one you are faxing, a cover should always be used.

Q. What happens if I do the procedure incorrectly and fax prematurely?
A. Don't panic. Many people fax prematurely when they haven't faxed in a long time. Just start over, most people won't mind if you try again.

Q. I have a personal and a business fax. Can transmissions become mixed up?
A. Being bi-faxual can be confusing, but so long as you use a cover with each one you won't transmit anything you're not supposed to.

Q. Is getting faxed by one person the same as with another?
A. No. Even though many people (especially lawyers) would like you to believe that the longer they are faxing you the better you will like it. In reality the best fax is short, of high quality, and very graphic.

Q. There is a man I'd very much like to fax (I've tried several times) but he can't seem to keep his equipment up long enough. Is there any thing I can do to help him?
A. You could suggest that he contact a good fax therapist, such as Canon or Mitsubishi. If he refuses to take the suggestion, it would be best if you just wrote him off.

pleb · « **Reply #142 on:** August 10, 2005, 04:33:28 PM »

lolol narc
where allyuh does get these things??

Narcissus · « **Reply #143 on:** August 10, 2005, 07:12:42 PM »

if i tell u i have to kill u

KillZone · « **Reply #144 on:** August 10, 2005, 07:32:33 PM »

Carigamers · « **Reply #144 on:** August 10, 2005, 07:32:33 PM »

Narcissus · « **Reply #145 on:** August 10, 2005, 08:29:55 PM »

wen da movie comin out...lol

Narcissus · « **Reply #146 on:** August 11, 2005, 12:13:14 AM »

A man in his 40's bought a new BMW and was out on the interstate for a nice evening drive. The top was down, the breeze was blowing through what was left of his hair, and he decided to open her up. As the needle jumped up to 80 mph, he suddenly saw flashing red and blue lights behind him. "There's no way they can catch a BMW," he thought to himself and opened her up further. The needle hit 90, 100.... then the reality of the situation hit him. "What the heck am I doing?" he thought and pulled over.

The cop came up to him, took his license without a word, and examined it and the car. "It's been a long day, this is the end of my shift, and it's Friday the 13th. I don't feel like more paperwork, so if you can give me an excuse for your driving that I haven't heard before, you can go." The guy thinks for a second and says, "Last week my wife ran off with a cop. I was afraid you were trying to give her back." "Have a nice weekend," said the officer.

Narcissus · « **Reply #147 on:** August 11, 2005, 02:38:43 PM »

Beer Festival
After the Great Britain Beer Festival, in London, all the brewery presidents decided to go out for a beer.

The guy from Corona sits down and says "Hey Sen~or, I would like the world's best beer, a Corona."

The bartender dusts off a bottle from the shelf and gives it to him.

The guy from Budweiser says "I'd like the best beer in the world, give me 'The King Of Beers, a Budweiser."

The bartender gives him one. The guy from Coors says "I'd like the only beer made with Rocky Mountain spring water, give me a Coors."

He gets it. The guy from Carib sits down and says "Give me a Coke."

The bartender is a little taken aback, but gives him what he ordered.

The other brewery presidents look over at him and ask "Why aren't you drinking a Carib?"

The Carib president replies "Well, if you guys aren't drinking beer, neither will I."

W1nTry · « **Reply #148 on:** August 12, 2005, 10:42:47 AM »

WOI BLUP BLUP!!! EVEN though I am a STAG man myselg... lol its TRINI that the bottom line.

cricketboi · « **Reply #149 on:** August 12, 2005, 10:50:07 AM »

fiyuuuhhh big up to d carib krew man.

Narcissus · « **Reply #150 on:** August 14, 2005, 05:00:27 PM »

I am a medical student currently doing a rotation in toxicology at the poison control center. Today, this woman called in very upset because she caught her little daughter eating ants. I quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful and there would be no need to bring her daughter into the hospital. She calmed down, and at the end of the conversation happened to mention that she gave her daughter some ant poison to eat in order to kill the ants. I told her that she better bring her daughter into the Emergency Room right away.

Narcissus · « **Reply #151 on:** August 17, 2005, 12:00:11 AM »

i hadda get a dog like that

Narcissus · « **Reply #152 on:** August 17, 2005, 12:15:25 AM »

stick em up

KillZone · « **Reply #153 on:** August 19, 2005, 07:48:55 PM »

Narcissus · « **Reply #154 on:** August 26, 2005, 10:53:37 PM »

KillZone · « **Reply #155 on:** August 27, 2005, 06:55:28 PM »

Narcissus · « **Reply #156 on:** August 28, 2005, 10:58:22 PM »

[Image Removed]

EDIT: Sorry, Narc, Voyd is right on this one. You're free to contribute as much as you like, but be more careful of just what you put up next time. Thanks.

Netizen1 · « **Reply #157 on:** August 29, 2005, 12:35:51 AM »

Hard Luck, that last one was a bit overboard...
Lose points for that

greyfox · « **Reply #158 on:** August 29, 2005, 01:39:31 AM »

some kids was having too much fun with his gi joe's

KillZone · « **Reply #159 on:** August 30, 2005, 08:22:38 PM »

Pumpkin War

Dead Pumpkin

Carigamers · « **Reply #159 on:** August 30, 2005, 08:22:38 PM »

Author Topic: Just a Joke (Read 214083 times)

Carigamers

Carigamers

Carigamers

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