Author Topic: Jokey News Thread  (Read 5137 times)

Offline strongton

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Jokey News Thread
« on: October 06, 2004, 07:05:18 AM »
Woman Police Say Sold Stones to Rioters Pleads No Contest

ST. JOSEPH, Mich. (AP) - A woman who police say sold stones to rioters in a southwest Michigan city last year and used the money to pay her cable television bill has pleaded no contest to inciting a riot.

Yuolanda Taylor, 32, entered the plea Monday. A no contest plea is not an admission of guilt but is treated as such for sentencing purposes. She is free on bail, but faces up to 10 years in prison at her sentencing Nov. 15.

The city of Benton Harbor was devastated by two nights of rioting last June sparked by the death of a black motorcyclist during a high-speed police chase. Twenty-one houses, many vacant, were destroyed.

Police said Taylor toted rocks through a riot-wracked neighborhood, selling small ones for $1 each and bigger ones for $5. Prosecutors said the rocks were thrown at police.

Taylor told police she collected about $70 selling rocks, but quit when she got hit by one herself.  (jah doh sleep)                    

Carigamers

Jokey News Thread
« on: October 06, 2004, 07:05:18 AM »

Offline strongton

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« Reply #1 on: October 06, 2004, 07:10:11 AM »
FREDERICK, Maryland (AP) -- Workers repairing a home damaged in a tornado discovered nearly two dozen boxes filled with child pornography. The homeowner remained jailed Monday on $96,000 bail.

Robert L. Medvee, 52, was charged Friday with 48 counts of creating computer images of child pornography and 48 counts of possession of child pornography, sheriff's Deputy Jennifer Bailey said.

The seized material -- computer discs, videotapes and photographs -- filled 20 to 24 boxes, Frederick County State's Attorney Scott Rolle said.

"It was the largest seizure of child pornography I've ever seen," Rolle said. "We had to bring in a pickup truck to get all of it out of there."

Rolle said more charges could be filed. It was not clear if Medvee had an attorney in the case.

Workers found the pornography while doing repairs to the house, damaged September 17 by the remnants of Hurricane Ivan, authorities said. Medvee was staying with friends at the time, police said.

yuh see fellas pornography will get yuh in trouble                    

Offline New Era Outlaw

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Jokey News Thread
« Reply #2 on: October 06, 2004, 07:29:24 AM »
Wrong thread again, strongton.

*pulls out golf club*
FORE!
*whap!*

(sends it over to de Bar)                    

Offline strongton

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« Reply #3 on: October 06, 2004, 07:36:46 AM »
like i giving yuh real work to to eh New_Era, sorry bout that, but i got confused with the bar that yuh is actually go to                    

Offline strongton

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« Reply #4 on: October 06, 2004, 07:44:55 AM »
An adult toy shut down a major regional airport for almost an hour on Monday when it was mistaken for a bomb, police said.

The vibrating object was discovered at Mackay Airport by a security officer who noticed the suspicious package inside a rubbish bin at the terminal cafeteria at 9.15am (AEST), a police spokeswoman said.

Cafeteria manager Lynne Bryant said her staff had been cleaning tables when they noticed a strange humming noise coming from the rubbish bin.

"It was rather disconcerting when the rubbish bin started humming furiously," she said.

"We called security and next minute everybody was being evacuated while they checked it out."

The police spokeswoman said the terminal was evacuated immediately. Passengers who had arrived on a recent flight, check-in staff, cafeteria employees and hire car personnel were all forced to leave.

"Another two flights were expected to land at that stage but alternate arrangements were made for the passengers to collect their luggage away from the terminal," the spokeswoman said.
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She said the emergency situation was revoked just before 10am when the package was identified as an adult novelty device.

Ms Bryant said at the time of the upheaval the airport had been quite busy with two main flights due in and out of the airport - wreaking havoc with people's schedules.

She said in retrospect the humming sounded exactly like a vibrator - but it was better to be safe then sorry.

"You can't afford to take chances," Ms Bryant said.                    

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Jokey News Thread
« Reply #4 on: October 06, 2004, 07:44:55 AM »

Offline W1nTry

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Jokey News Thread
« Reply #5 on: October 06, 2004, 03:15:44 PM »
Strong boy if yuh keep this up they could start a new forum for yuh "the week in review"                    

Offline Bourbon_Ghost

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« Reply #6 on: October 07, 2004, 02:58:37 PM »
Man cries Out!

Stop hitting meh woman....(sobs)...I fed up of this lashing thing you does lash meh to hard.....(sob, sniffs)...
Neighbours next door awake and call 999. The Operator says they already have someone at that location.

*buddum bum ching* :lol:                    
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Offline carlsberg

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« Reply #7 on: October 08, 2004, 08:01:50 AM »
carlsberg ROFLOL. . . . .:-)                    
JIHAD




Offline Bourbon_Ghost

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« Reply #8 on: October 08, 2004, 01:03:01 PM »
On Regional News Tonight

A reporter in Kingston reporting on to local tele station.

Reporter over transmition: .......(cackling sounds)...a....hurri.....blows......widely....(argh).....spouting ....(buffaw)....everywhere.....

Locals listening to news report in bar in astounishment.

......its getting......(baww)harder......my...(muahsch)stiff.....really.....(boom)hard.....(transmition cuts off).

News Station: Um...we're sorry for that......(laughter can be heard in background)we seem..(awwww)..to be having some technical difficulties!

Locals in bar totally dumb founded.                    
\"ONLY THOSE WHO ARE WORTHY ARE CALLED UPON\"

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Offline Imperial_X

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« Reply #9 on: October 08, 2004, 01:26:29 PM »
A man was found in the Brian Lara Promenade wearing a suit of mirrors.  Police officials stated that the man was indeed very sane as he went with them willingly after he had a chance to reflect.                    
Consciousness yearn to kill
To re-affirm the will,
Zealous I burn the drill
Forging, I mould the skill.

Offline Bourbon_Ghost

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« Reply #10 on: October 08, 2004, 02:13:26 PM »
Bartender News.

Bartender starts;

A husband (he's a doctor nah) and he wife having a fight when ah tell yuh is backnall at the table. D Husband gets up in a rage and say,
"And you are no good in bed either," and leave d house.
After he cool down he realize he was bitter and decide to make it up and call she. She come to the phone after many rings and by the time she come he vexx,
"What take yuh so long to answer the phone?"
She says, "I was in bed."
"In bed this late.....doing what?" he said.
"Getting a second opinion!"

Man whom bartender was telling story too(smirks to himself).
bartender asks inquiring;
"Like yuh know something, I don't know?"

Man replys hastely;"me nah....nah i don't know nothing"

Bartender after man leaves thoughtfully'she get ah 3rd opinion too'                    
\"ONLY THOSE WHO ARE WORTHY ARE CALLED UPON\"

BOURBON 4 LIFE

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Offline PyroSlasher

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« Reply #11 on: October 09, 2004, 07:25:15 AM »
Well the other day in the Guardian's Odd Spot,a fella thought his dick was a chicken head and chopped it off.Then the dog eat it.                    

Offline carlsberg

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« Reply #12 on: October 09, 2004, 01:50:40 PM »
ROFLOL they ususally have sum crazy crap in the ODD SPOT!!!!
esp. dumb tings dat dumb bandits do!!                    
JIHAD




Offline W1nTry

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« Reply #13 on: October 10, 2004, 01:43:49 AM »
whoa that last one was kinda brutal..... *shivers at the thought of the whole thing....*                    

Offline cereal_killer

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« Reply #14 on: October 10, 2004, 12:27:07 PM »
Quote
whoa that last one was kinda brutal..... *shivers at the thought of the whole thing....*



agrees
oh yeah dat real frightning                    

Offline New Era Outlaw

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« Reply #15 on: October 10, 2004, 02:04:35 PM »
Actually, I think you have to be a real GOOBER to cut your wee-wee off and think it's a chicken head. One thing, though....did he even bother asking WHAT is a chicken head doing there to begin with? :lol:                    

Offline Imperial_X

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« Reply #16 on: October 10, 2004, 04:59:22 PM »
Quote
Bartender News.

Bartender starts;

A husband (he's a doctor nah) and he wife having a fight when ah tell yuh is backnall at the table. D Husband gets up in a rage and say,  
\"And you are no good in bed either,\" and leave d house.
After he cool down he realize he was bitter and decide to make it up and call she. She come to the phone after many rings and by the time she come he vexx,  
\"What take yuh so long to answer the phone?\"
She says, \"I was in bed.\"  
\"In bed this late.....doing what?\" he said.
\"Getting a second opinion!\"

Man whom bartender was telling story too(smirks to himself).
bartender asks inquiring;
\"Like yuh know something, I don't know?\"

Man replys hastely;\"me nah....nah i don't know nothing\"

Bartender after man leaves thoughtfully'she get ah 3rd opinion too'

Am I more retarded than I thought, or is this sh!t just unoverstandable?                    
Consciousness yearn to kill
To re-affirm the will,
Zealous I burn the drill
Forging, I mould the skill.

Offline W1nTry

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Jokey News Thread
« Reply #17 on: October 10, 2004, 11:46:06 PM »
Dread in the case where he has to ask himself what a chicken head doing there, you have to ask what could he be doing on a regular basis perhaps that would lead him to think that having a chicken's head there is normal..... 0_o                    

Offline New Era Outlaw

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Jokey News Thread
« Reply #18 on: October 11, 2004, 01:14:47 AM »
Perhaps he's a butcher.
But then again, just how DOES a chicken head even remotely resemble a ding-dong now?                    

Offline Bourbon_Ghost

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« Reply #19 on: October 11, 2004, 01:27:09 PM »
^^^lol@reamrks.
darn iforgot my news!
*grumbles*                    
\"ONLY THOSE WHO ARE WORTHY ARE CALLED UPON\"

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Carigamers

Jokey News Thread
« Reply #19 on: October 11, 2004, 01:27:09 PM »

 


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