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Messages - byakuya
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« on: May 20, 2007, 01:50:40 AM »
The Way To Heaven
The nun teaching Sunday School was speaking to her class one morning and
she asked the question, "When you die and go to Heaven... which part of
your body goes first?"
Suzy raised her hand and said, "I think it's your hands."
Why do you think it's your hands, Suzy?"
Suzy replied, "Because when you pray, you hold your hands together in
front of you and God just takes your hands first."
"What a wonderful answer!" the nun said.
Little Johnny raised his hand and said, "Sister, I think it's your
legs."
The nun looked at him with the strangest look on her face.
"Now, Little Johnny, why do you think it would be your legs?"
Little Johnny said, "Well, I walked into Mommy and Daddy's bedroom the
other night. Mommy had her legs straight up in the air and she was saying, "Oh God,I'm coming!"
If Dad hadn't pinned her down, we'd have lost her."
The nun fainted
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« on: May 20, 2007, 01:30:27 AM »
This beautiful woman one day walks into a doctors office and the doctor is bowled over by how stunningly awesome she is. All his professionallism goes right out the window...
He tells her to take her pants, she does, and he starts rubbing her thighs.
"Do you know what I am doing?" asks the doctor?
"Yes, checking for abnormalities." she replies.
He tells her to take off her shirt and bra, she takes them off. The doctor begins rubbing her breasts and asks, "Do you know what I am doing now?", she replies, "Yes, checking for cancer."
Finally, he tells her to take off her panties, lays her on the table, gets on top of her and starts having sex with her. He says to her, "Do you know what I am doing now?"
She replies, "Yes, getting herpies - thats why I am here!"
3
« on: May 20, 2007, 01:15:30 AM »
A blind man interviews for a job as a quality controller at the local wood mill. The manager calls the blind man into his office and asks him how he expected to do this job since he was blind. The blind man replied he would do it by smell. The manager decides to test him and places a piece of wood in front of him. The manager asks, "What is it without touching it?" The blind man replies, "That’s a good piece of fir." "Correct,” says the manager, “now try this one." "That’s a bad piece of willow," says the blind man. "Correct," answers the manager.
With that, the manager decides to play a trick on the blind man. He get his secretary to lift up her dress and put her crotch in the blind mans face. "I'm confused,” says the blind man, “Can you turn it around?" The secretary turns around and puts her ass in his face. The blind man says, "Oh, you’re trying to fool me! But I know exactly what kind of wood that is. It’s the sh1t house door off a tuna boat!"
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« on: May 05, 2007, 02:40:15 PM »
This is d kinda BS i hadda go through
1. staying in skool 4 3 weeks straight from 7 am 2 7 pm monday to sunday, trying to finnish my Internal assesments
2. loosing 12 pages of d project and having to type it all over
3. Being the first person in class to hand in their computer project and d teacher says that he lost it but everyone elses project got corrected...
4. I carried one of my projects to be bound and d people f'd it up by tearing the holes so i hadda go out and buy more paper and reprint the entire thing ... close to 50 pages.
5
« on: May 05, 2007, 02:26:09 PM »
Girl i all over you like a table cloth on a table,,
girl if i waz ur daddy i would smack dat ass...
girl if i had to choose between u and d sun i would be one blind son of a bitch
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« on: April 30, 2007, 01:36:58 PM »
when i was younger, around the time when i used to go to primary school i used to be real ass and make fun of this ugly chick now 6 years later i c her again and she aint ugly........ WTMC
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« on: April 28, 2007, 03:37:01 PM »
when u go to deltex to buy $60 in paper 4 a project and half d damn paper loss and some fall in d drain it does geyt yuh vexx..
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