Author Topic: Just a Joke (Read 213418 times)

Jdcrys_Shinkuu · « **Reply #340 on:** May 08, 2006, 04:41:29 PM »

one day a pirate walked into a pet store and asked for a parrot. The ladie replied, "I am sorry but we only have one parrot and, well, he isn't very pirate...ish..."

The pirate looked at the lady and said, "what do ya mean 'not very piratish'"?

The atendant awnsered "Well he sings chrismas carols when you light a match under his feet."

"Well let me see him,"said the pirate, "I realy need a parrot."

The attendant brought out the parrot and a box of matches.

"Here watch this" She said.She ;it a match and place it under his right foot.

The parrot squaked and started to sing "Away in a manger no crib for a bed..."

she blew the match out lit another and placed it under his right foot.

The parrot began to sing "Jingle bells, Batman smells Robin laid an egg......"

She looked at the pirate who look very unsure. "He sings this one really really loud though."

she lit a third match, put it between the parrots legs and he squaked at the top of his lungs...

"CHESTNUTS ROASTING ON AN OPEN FIRE!!!"

Carigamers · « **Reply #340 on:** May 08, 2006, 04:41:29 PM »

ProtoJoe · « **Reply #341 on:** May 09, 2006, 11:13:39 AM »

Mexican Doctor

A young lady was having a conversation with a Trinidadian one day
and told him that she had returned to Trinidad to get married. He
couldn't understand why after living abroad for so many years she
couldn't find a nice man to marry instead of coming back to
Trinidad.

She eventually told him that she was getting married to a Mexican
doctor (in a very pronounced American accent at that). Well the
guy couldn't believe what he had heard and told her, "A Mexican
doctor! But girl, ah real happy for yuh. Yuh real do good for
yuhself!".

Eventually the day of the wedding came and the same guy who she
told about the wedding decided that he wanted to pass by and see
for himself how things were proceeding. He however noticed that
all that was playing at the reception was dub (dancehall) music.
He couldn't understand how they would only be playing dub music
and the guy was Mexican, so he decided to ask someone about it.

He said, "Hear nah...how come dey playin so much ah dub, an de
fella is a Mexican doctor?".

The other person said, "Mexican doctor...man... de fella is a maxi
conductor!!"

Okay, try saying it with an american accent, maxi conductor

ProtoJoe · « **Reply #342 on:** May 11, 2006, 11:47:38 AM »

I guess its ok for me to post again since its been awhile since the last post....

I could honestly see my self doing this:

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cell phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands free speaker-function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen.

Man: "Hello"
Woman: "Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?"
Man: "Yes"
Woman: "I'm at the mall now and found this beautiful leather coat. It's only $1,000. Is it okay if I buy it?”
Man: "A grand, sure, go ahead if you like it that much."
Woman: "I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the new 2006 models, I saw one I really liked."
Man: "How much?"
Woman: $90,000."
Man: "Okay but for $90,000, I want it with all the options."
Woman: Great! Oh, and one more thing... the house I wanted last year is back on the market - they're asking $950,000."
Man: 'Well, go ahead and give them an offer of $900,000. They will probably take it. I not, we can go the extra 50 thousand. It is clearly a pretty good price."
Woman: "Okay I'll see you later! I love you so much!!"
Man: "Bye, I love you, too."

The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room are staring at him in astonishment, mouths agape... He smiles and asks: "Anyone know who this phone belongs to?"

Jdcrys_Shinkuu · « **Reply #343 on:** May 11, 2006, 01:00:19 PM »

lol @ not his phone!

Panday makes a call to London

Panday <-- i callin from THE CELL

Friend <---- DIGICELL or TSTT

Panday <--- Golden Grove

Friend <----- A New Company? What are their RATES like!

got that from my girlfriend....

Click on the GIF

Kaizen · « **Reply #344 on:** May 16, 2006, 04:18:55 AM »

some humor....classic internet pics

Carigamers · « **Reply #344 on:** May 16, 2006, 04:18:55 AM »

EmpireKing · « **Reply #345 on:** May 16, 2006, 05:18:45 PM »

SERIOUS(1st one) but Funny(2nd one) (jus got it in email)

TWO TRUE STORIES ABOUT RACISM

1) I'm sure many of you watched the recent taping of the Oprah Winfrey

Show where her guest was Tommy Hilfiger. On the show, she asked him if
the statements about race he was accused of saying were true.
Statements like"..."If I'd known African-Americans, Hispanics, Jewish
and Asians would buy my clothes, I WOULD NOT have made them so nice. I
wish these people would *NOT* buy my clothes, as they are made for upper
class white people."

His answer to Oprah was a simple "YES".
Where after she immediately asked him to leave her show.

My suggestion? Don't buy your next shirt or perfume from Tommy Hilfiger.
Let's give him what he asked for. Let's not buy his clothes, let's put
Him in a financial state where he himself will not be able to afford the
ridiculous prices he puts on his clothes.
Let's find out if Non-whites really play such a small part in
the world. Stop buying any range of their product, perfume, cosmetics,
clothes, bags, etc.,

2) Scene took place on a British Airways flight between Johannesburg and London .

A White woman, about 50 years old, was seated next to a black man.
Obviously disturbed by this, she called the air Hostess. "Madam, what is
the matter," the hostess asked. "You obviously do not see it then?" she
responded. "You placed me next to a black man. I do not agree to sit next to
someone from such a repugnant group. Give me an alternative seat."
"Be calm please," the hostess replied. "Almost all the places on this
Flight is taken.

I will go to see if another place is available." The Hostess went
away and t hen came back a few minutes later. "Madam, Just as I thought,
there are no other available seats in the economy class. I spoke to the
captain and he informed me that there is a seat in the business class.
All the same, we still have one place in the first class." Before the woman
could say anything, the hostess continued: "It is not Usual for our
company to permit someone from the economy class to sit in the first
class. However, given the circumstances, the captain feels that it would be
scandalous to make someone sit next to someone so disgusting." She
turned to the black guy, and said, "Therefore, Sir, if you would like to,
please collect your hand luggage, a seat awaits you in first class."
At that moment, the other passengers who were shocked by what they had
Just witnessed stood up and applauded.

New Era Outlaw · « **Reply #346 on:** May 16, 2006, 06:09:53 PM »

Err....about that first one.....it's not exactly true (click link to see.) I don't think anybody would be that stupid to risk killing their business.

As for the second, if that was true, I would've gotten up and appauded with the others myself.
The sad thing is, I actually know a few people who are like that. It's just pathetic, really.

Spazosaurus · « **Reply #347 on:** May 16, 2006, 07:27:55 PM »

A first grade teacher explains to her class that she is Bajan . She asked her students to raise their hands if they were Bajan too. Not really knowing why but wanting to be like their teacher, their hands explode into the air like flashy fireworks. There is, however, one exception. A girl named Charlene has not gone along with the crowd.

The teacher asks her why she has decided to be different. "Because I am not Bajan .." "Then", asked the teacher, "What are you?". Im a proud Trini ."boasts the little girl.

The teacher is a little perturbed now, her face slightly red. She asked Charlene why she is a Trini .. "Well, my mom and dad are Trini , so i am Trini too."

The teacher is now angry. "Thats no reason," she says loudly. "What if your mom was a moron, and your dad was a moron. What would you be then?"

A pause and then a smile. "Then," says Charlene "I would be a Bajan .."

New Era Outlaw · « **Reply #348 on:** May 16, 2006, 08:33:25 PM »

Oh shi-

Chakura for you. NOW.

Spazosaurus · « **Reply #349 on:** May 23, 2006, 08:03:11 PM »

Bank Robbery

Once inside the bank shortly after midnight, their efforts at disabling the security system got underway immediately.

The robbers,who expected to find one or two large safes filled with cash &valuables, were
surprised to see hundreds of smaller safes throughout the bank.

The robbers cracked the first safe's combination, and inside theyfound only a small bowl of vanilla pudding!
As recorded on the bank's audio tape system, one robber said, "At least we'll have a bit to eat."

The robbers opened up a second safe, and it also contained nothing but vanilla pudding.

The process continued until all safes were opened.

They did not find one dollar, a diamond, or an ounce of gold.

Instead, all the safes contained covered bowls of pudding.

Disappointed, the robbers made a quiet exit, each leaving with nothing
more than a queasy, uncomfortably full stomach. The newspaper
headline read:

ARKANSAS' LARGEST SPERM BANK ROBBED EARLY THIS MORNING...

EmpireKing · « **Reply #350 on:** May 25, 2006, 05:41:49 PM »

thats disgusting

New Era Outlaw · « **Reply #351 on:** May 25, 2006, 08:17:27 PM »

....what disturbs me is the fact that they didn't even notice the difference in the taste of the so-called 'pudding'.

Spazosaurus · « **Reply #352 on:** May 25, 2006, 08:22:16 PM »

Who knows...after 'pudding' sits down for a while in a refridgerated environment, it just might taste like pudding....I'm not willing to experiment to find out though.

TriniXaeno · « **Reply #353 on:** May 25, 2006, 08:41:50 PM »

someone who frequents seedy locales like woodbrook sidestreets at 2AM may be able to clear the air on the issue.

Narcissus · « **Reply #354 on:** May 26, 2006, 10:38:44 AM »

it only hav one woodbrook sidestreet i know bout an tha was to go play game...but i wouldn mmind findin the seedy locales...directions anyone?

Spazosaurus · « **Reply #355 on:** May 26, 2006, 10:43:29 AM »

Side streets? Things reach a higher level where is no longer side streets alone, but on main roads too. Take a drive down Roberts street late at night and youll see what i mean.

Hidden_Ninja · « **Reply #356 on:** May 26, 2006, 12:13:35 PM »

Something told me not to read this

W1nTry · « **Reply #357 on:** May 26, 2006, 05:40:46 PM »

Yo pplz the hijacking, STOP. Let's stick to the Just a Joke thread plz.

Spazosaurus · « **Reply #358 on:** May 28, 2006, 06:55:19 AM »

There was Manning, Panday, Robbie, and Sat Maharaj. All four of them were on top of a cliff discussing the difficulties that their people had gone through.

Sat Maharaj said, "my people have suffered the most, and in honor of what they have endured, I will fling myself off this cliff in hopes that my blood will change things."

So he yelled "THIS IS FOR MY PEOPLE", and jumped off the cliff,

Robbie not wanting to be outdone, quickly looked at the other two and followed yelling "THIS IS FOR MY PEOPLE" and jumped off the cliff as well.

Manning was touched by this and decided it was his turn, so he yelled "THIS IS FOR MY PEOPLE" and pushed Panday off the cliff!

STOP LAUGHING!!!!!

W1nTry · « **Reply #359 on:** May 31, 2006, 09:32:57 AM »

Dread that's funny and also not far from the truth. I've been in the US lately and I must say coming back home to hear politicians playing the race card (see Camila) in SUCH a large way, plus if the implications of what is being said is true... it's a SAD SAD country we live in. Your joke is funny and yet not, as the irony of your joke is that it's more or less a metaphorical depiction of the reality that is Trinindad today.

Carigamers · « **Reply #359 on:** May 31, 2006, 09:32:57 AM »

Author Topic: Just a Joke (Read 213418 times)

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