Author Topic: My very own Tetris thread  (Read 2908 times)

Offline Narcissus

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My very own Tetris thread
« on: July 25, 2005, 04:28:27 PM »
The Pieces

These are the blocks that the player must use in the game. Officially, they are known as "Tetraminoes," but this label is a clear example of how capitalist American pigs have raped the original Communist glory of our holy holy game. From now on, they shall be referred to simply as pieces or blocks.

As four is key in the numerology of Tetris, all pieces are composed of four elements, or smaller blocks. The four smaller blocks can only be arranged in seven ways, and those ways are the Tetris pieces:
 

 

 THE COCK PIECE


As is quite apparent for anyone who has seen a game of Tetris being played, or even participated in a competition themselves, Tetris obviously contains sexual undertones. The most prominent is the coveted phallic block, known officially as the "I-Piece." This block plays a crucial role, in that it is the main requirement for the act of a Tetris, or four simultaneous lines. The Cock Piece is the main source of most players' misery -- and joy.
 
 THE MIDDLE FINGER PIECE


Ah, the Middle Finger Piece. Unique, as it is the only block, with appendages, that is symmetrical. The greatest number of lines you can deplete with this piece, unfortunately, is only two
 
THE ASS BLOCK


Officially, this block is called the "O Piece." Oh, confound that Ass Block. It is a great source of misery. If there is no flat space for the Ass Block to rest, this is a great inconvenience. We suggest always keeping space around for the Ass Block, in case it decides to visit you. Also, you can keep rotating the Ass Block, but to no avail! It don't do shit, as the Ass Block is radially symmetrical.
 
 THE "L" PIECE


Most players ask us, "Why do you call that one the L Piece?" Because it looks like a $%#ing L.
 
 THE REVERSE "L"


Officially, this is known as the "J Piece," and like its twisted cousin, the L Piece, it can be used for a maximum of three depleted lines. Both the L and the Reverse L can be used for the Slide Under
 
 THE "Z" PIECE


The Z and S Pieces are somewhat of an oddity in the realm of the Tetris blocks. Both of these pieces have only two available positions; rotating them clockwise or counter-clockwise will end with the exact same result. A total of two depleted lines is maximum with either.
 
 THE "S" PIECE


The sideways younger brother to the Z Piece; it's regarded as a black sheep, and everywhere Z Piece goes, it is embarrassed by S Piece.

 
 
« Last Edit: July 25, 2005, 09:03:49 PM by [X]-Baego »

Carigamers

My very own Tetris thread
« on: July 25, 2005, 04:28:27 PM »

Offline Kaizen

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Re: My very own Tetris thread
« Reply #1 on: July 25, 2005, 04:34:21 PM »
lol kudos u got nothing to do boy
lol chakra iymc



Offline Narcissus

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Re: My very own Tetris thread
« Reply #2 on: July 25, 2005, 04:38:05 PM »
Catalog of Tetraterms & Slang

Throughout the ages, a certain terminology -- almost a new language -- has developed around Tetris. As the tetraterms & associated slang are somewhat Freudian, we've done our best to catalog them, dictionary-style, as follows:
 
TETRIBATE
To engage in solo Tetris playing.

TETRIGASM
The euphoric sensation resulting from high altitude Tetris attacks, and often the Rapage of the Rectum with the Cock Piece and the defeat of one's opponent. Take your most enjoyable orgasm... multiply it by a thousand. And you're not even close.

PREMATURE TETRACULATION
Occurs in a game that ends very quickly, usually before a player can get a sufficient number of lines. Officially, Premature Tetraculation has occured if you lose having depleted less than ten lines.

TETRANCE
The state where a player is zoned into the game of Tetris and regards Tetris as the most important thing at that moment, often to the point of blocking out surroundings. It is quite possible for spectators of a game to be in Tetrance, even though they are not playing the game.

SODA POPINSKI
Fictional, legendary boxer and Tetris competitor. A mythical player; to refer to one's move as "like Popinski," "Popinski-like," "Popinkski-esque," or "Soda," is a great compliment.
Example:
Player One: "Dude, that move was totally Soda!"
Player Two: "Utmost gratitude, friend."

BUILDING SCULPTURES
or BEING AN ARCHITECT
or ARCHITECTING
Layering of blocks in an unorthodox, yet often aestheticly pleasing, manner. Indeed, this is usually considered harmful to the player's ability to win.
 
BUILDING/CONSTRUCTING CASTLE(S)/CASTLE WALLS
The phenomenon that occurs with a visual look similar to that of a castle. In these instances, there is no feasable place for an Ass Block (or L-piece) when it visits!
 
"T" IT UP
To engage in Tetris play.
Example:
Player One: "Shall we T it up?"
Player Two: "You're on."
 

NOCTURNAL TETRACULATION
Dreaming of Tetris, resulting in a euphoric sensation similar to that of a tetrigasm.

TETRANXIETY
Stress caused by Tetris. This is sometimes a result of insufficient performance in Tetris.

Nocturnal Tetranxiety is very common. There have been cases in which individuals have had trouble sleeping due to this phenomenon.

FIENDING
Simply an irresistable urge to play Tetris.

FIENDING FOR THE START
The sudden Game Pause that occurs when a player has hit start believing he or she is the first player. In many official Tetris derivatives, a two player Tetris battle will only start when Player One has hit the Start button. If both players press Start, and Player Two's has registered second, the game will Pause and Player Two has "Fiended for the Start."

TETRONI
A player who is not very adept at playing Tetris; an easy win.

Offline TriniXaeno

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Re: My very own Tetris thread
« Reply #3 on: July 25, 2005, 09:04:40 PM »
ode to a big game indeed.

I'm a fan of it's multiplayer PC incarnations!

6 player tetris madness

tetron and tetrinet

Offline W1nTry

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Re: My very own Tetris thread
« Reply #4 on: July 26, 2005, 09:17:35 AM »
6 player madness you say??? wow... what rock have I been under... the most I ever did was hook up to gameboys and lihixx... dread baego hit meh a link dread.... I have been under my rock for far too long.. time to walk into the light that is multiplayer tetris... that beind said is there a downloadable version that I can run on a local server at home to swuheat against meh bros over the network?

Carigamers

Re: My very own Tetris thread
« Reply #4 on: July 26, 2005, 09:17:35 AM »

Offline suzieboy

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Re: My very own Tetris thread
« Reply #5 on: July 26, 2005, 09:21:45 AM »
Tetris is ah serious game fellas.......when i had meh NES 12 yrs ago,my fadda never let me play this on a normal basis bec I used to do crap and he had to show me wat to do.

Offline Narcissus

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Re: My very own Tetris thread
« Reply #6 on: July 26, 2005, 10:25:02 AM »
Spirituality of Tetris:
Predestination of Blocks

Order in Randomness

It appears that the Tetris pieces that visit the player are in random order. This is correct; the pieces do not go in any specific order; they are dealt to the player as if they were cards in a poker game. However, in poker there is a limited number of cards in each deck, while the pieces dealt in Tetris are from a seemingly limitless stock of pieces -- they will never cease to visit until the game has ended.

 

Predetermined Visitors

However, with recent updates in technology we can take a closer look at the random mechanism in Tetris. Using a Nintendo Entertainment System emulator on a home computer, we can make a proper analysis. Emulation software allows us to take a "freeze" -- saving the temporary RAM data -- at any point in the game. What this means is that we can pause the game in a way never before possible. Quite often, and in many derivatives of Tetris, you are able to pause the game. However, these game freezes allow us to pause the game and take multiple, different "unpauses." Bear with me here...

For example, we start a Tetris game. The first block is a Middle Finger piece; the "Next" space shows that the next visitor is a Z-Piece. At this point, quite early on in the game, we make a freeze of the game. The next pieces are, in order: Cock Piece, Z-Piece, Cock Piece, S-Piece, S-Piece, Reverse L-Piece, Z-Piece, Middle Finger Piece, Z-Piece, L-Piece, an Ass Block, etc.

Next we "defrost" our saved state. This would be the same as returning us back in time to the beginning of the game. Our next pieces turn out to be, in order: Cock Piece, Z-Piece, Cock Piece, S-Piece, S-Piece, Reverse L-Piece, Z-Piece, Middle Finger Piece, Z-Piece, L-Piece, an Ass Block, etc.

We got the exact same pieces, even though in both games the player had done different placements! What we discover is that the Tetris pieces that visit the player are not randomly chosen right before the next piece arrives -- they are all chosen at the very beginning of the game. Every piece has already been chosen for you. The blocks have their own sense of predestination, as they have all been determined before you have even made your first game.

 

Two-Player Application

The same applies to a Two-Player game, except that both opponents -- if the derivative of Tetris is official and true -- receive the same pieces in the same order. This makes sense, as it is a true battle of skill since both players are dealt the same hand.

 

Predetermined Game

Again, your pieces have already been determined at the first moment the game begins. Many Tetris players view this is a sign of a sort of spirituality in their Tetris game: not only are the pieces determined instantly as the game begins, but every move you make and choice you choose is determined at this very instant. This is the "Birth of Life" moment, when in an instant the entire game has already been laid out. Of course, the moves and choices that have already been laid out to occur all depend on the player's particular Tetris intellect and playing style.

 

Outside Interference

We can apply this aspect of the blocks' predetermination -- and therefore your moves' predetermination -- to all aspects of the game. Once a certain player develops a particular playing style, that player will be even more likely to make the same choice given the same particular circumstances. However, there are many aspects that hinder this: outside interference. Stress, of course as well as aural and visual distractions, can hinder what choices would normally have been made. Unfortunately this only works in a negative way, and it is what stops many Tetris players from reaching the limits they normally would be able to reach.

This stress-distraction factor is also a reason that many professional Tetris competitors have their own routine of breathing and/or meditation before their matches.
 

Offline Narcissus

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Re: My very own Tetris thread
« Reply #7 on: July 26, 2005, 10:29:07 AM »
Murphy's Law of Tetris

If anything can go wrong, it will.

Murphy's Law applies to everything in life; this is especially true in the Art of Tetris. (Please note that the following section is entirely theoretical, and may not be suitable for the beginning Tetris player.)
 
For those familiar, of course, with the player's lust for the Cock Piece, Murphy's Law of Tetris makes perfect sense. Whenever you most need the Cock Piece to complete a Tetris, your chances of said Cock Piece visiting you are quite diminished. Likewise, suppose you no longer have a 4-row-deep rectum: Since of course in this situation there is no chance of achieving a Tetris, a Cock Piece is more likely to visit you. No matter how much the player frets, this is a true and constant aspect of the Tetris phenomenon.

 
A Cock Piece is nowhere in sight... 

Until you #$%^ up.

 
Murphy's Law of Tetris looms over all of us. This is a shadow which causes us much pain and anguish...

Yo Narci NO fowl language in the thread man, you've been warned
« Last Edit: July 26, 2005, 11:15:39 AM by W1nTry »

Offline suzieboy

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Re: My very own Tetris thread
« Reply #8 on: July 26, 2005, 11:05:59 AM »
LOL....this is seriously true its ridiculous....

Offline TriniXaeno

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Re: My very own Tetris thread
« Reply #9 on: July 26, 2005, 05:55:46 PM »
yeah, I'll link the scene boy w1ntry.

got a server for 'em running already.

www.blocktrix.org

this is one of the newer and better clients for the multiplayer bachanal.

check out a screenshot.

Offline Narcissus

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Re: My very own Tetris thread
« Reply #10 on: July 26, 2005, 07:50:11 PM »
Tetris is part of everyday life observe:

Offline Narcissus

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Re: My very own Tetris thread
« Reply #11 on: July 27, 2005, 01:24:41 AM »
tetris animated movie clip vist the link and download
http://web.syr.edu/%7Ejashubac/Animation.htm

Carigamers

Re: My very own Tetris thread
« Reply #11 on: July 27, 2005, 01:24:41 AM »

 


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